I've been enjoying hearing from MSF'ers this week and hope my advice has been helpful. Keep em coming!
A particular trend I've noticed is men asking how to make the first introduction successful (the dreaded first email!), so here's some general advice I hope you'll find useful:
On looks:
If you have pages of sent mail and none of them have been replied to, there's something up!
Sorry, but it sounds like you are punching above your weight. Men generally tend to over estimate how attractive they are. I have had clients, who when pressed, admit that they are perhaps a 4-5 out of ten yet email women they would rate at around an 8 out of ten. No wonder they don't get any responses!
So, be brutal, look at your photo and rate yourself from 1-10 on looks. Give yourself a scortchingly honest score. The girls you are emailing should be around the same score as you.
The only get out jail card is if you have a killer sense of humour. If you can make a girl laugh a) with your profile b) with your first one line email, then you can try pitching at any level. David Walliams is living proof of this principle.
On emails:
You’ve got to remember that your first email is a bit like that flirtatious first look across the bar. Basically you are saying, hey, I find you cute, do you fancy me? That’s all it is, plain and simple. If they respond they are saying, yes, I like your profile, lets take this further.
Ideally your first email should just be a bit of a cheeky one liner showing you’ve read her profile (important!). You can use some classic techniques like pulling her pony tails (tease her gently about something on her profile), or comment on something you both have in common. It’s just about perking her interest to look at your profile.
The key here is to be realistic. Internet dating can sometimes be brutal. Ultimately it then becomes a numbers game. If you get more than 3/4 emails back for every ten you send, crack out the bubbly!
On subscriptions, MSF actually has a very high level of active subscribers compared to other sites. I’d like to tell you how much, but then I’d have to kill you, so you’ll just have to trust me on that one!
What are your top tips? Had any experiences you would like to share? Agree or disagree?
Please feel free to submit your dating queries and quibbles to Sam here.
