Fab Profile Alert: Miranda

This truly is top of the range response writing. Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding for Miranda.

'I eat animals, but only horrible ones. I like cheese, stripes, Generation Kill, The Daily Show, clean sheets, eating, drinking, cycling, roaring fires, quiet fires, funeral pyres, plyers, tires and telephone wires. I take myself very seriously to make up for the fact that no one else does.

My ideal man is probably not too much of a big girl's blouse, more the strong, silent type, or even the noisy, brutush type, as long as you are not the really sappy type who prides himself on being spiritual, weepy and metrosexual. On my part, I promise to interested in your sport and not squeal with disgust when you take The Sun to the bog with you.'

Form an orderly queue guys, and click here to learn more about Miranda.