16 Jan 2017

3 unrealistic dating expectations you need to let go of

Category: Advice
Author: Karen
When it all boils down to it, the main reason relationships end is because one or both parties don't get their expectations met. Of course, everyone has a number of expectations when they get together with someone, most of which are perfectly reasonable, some of which are less so, and the trick is trying to differentiate between the two. Here are three expectations that you might think are absolutely fine, but could quite easily erode the foundations of your lovely new relationship.

"Once I'm in a relationship, my life will be complete"

If you're feeling a bit lonely and as if you're missing a piece, like a charity shop jigsaw puzzle, it's very easy to fall into the trap of believing that another human being can complete you. The truth is, no one else can ever do that, and thinking that they can will only put a huge amount of strain on a relationship when your partner inevitably fails to make you feel magically whole. A good relationship can add huge positives to your life, but only you can find that extra puzzle piece.

"My new beau will want to spend every spare second with me"

Most new couples go through a stage where they disappear for six months and then surface six months later, remembering they have friends and family who would like to see them as well. This is perfectly normal, but it's vital to remember that after this initial crazy can't-keep-your-hands-off-each-other madness, your significant other is going to want to return to their social life and you won't be together every second of the day. If you don't allow them this space, your relationship will crumble like a bit of badly made flapjack, so make sure you're prepared to share if you want your relationship to flourish.

"My new partner will be able to read my mind"

OK, so maybe you won't expect actual telepathy, but many people unrealistically expect their partner to know what they're thinking or feeling, and then get cross with them when they don't. Whilst your partner should come to know you better than anyone else, they are still not actually privy to the complicated inner workings of your crazy mind, so you need to help them out. Communication is the key to a successful relationship, so do both of you a favour and talk about how you're feeling.

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