MySingleFriend

Sam said...

The thing to know is John is a joyful force of nature. I found this out when we met at uni 22 years ago (unless of course he's lied about his age in the profile, in which case we were prodigies who met at nursery).

Two decades on, I still find him an absolute hoot. He has the sort of personality that leaves us less gregarious mortals slack-jawed in wonder. In a room full of strangers, I've seen him engage the most anti-social folk in conversation and put the shyest person at ease while holding forth on pretty much any subject. His sociability is reflected in his wide variety of friends, men, women, young, old - and everybody's mother (mine wants to adopt him). His ability to be the life and soul is nicely offset by the fact I have always found him ideal company for lazy Sunday afternoons spent on the sofa, eating junk, watching crap telly, and reading choice bits from the tabloids.

His sense of fun is coupled with an incredibly kind nature that makes him a diamond of a friend. When you're on a downer, he's Mary Sunshine on the other end of the phone, dragging you kicking and screaming out of it, then arriving on the doorstep with dinner and wine. He's fiercely loyal and will defend his mates like a terrier. Brilliant in a crisis, he has a great can-do, take-charge attitude.

As a mate he can be guaranteed to look after you when drunk, (in fact, carry you from the pub, prop you up in a shop window, get you in a taxi, stop said taxi and open door to allow you to puke AND rescue your sunglasses which have fallen off your face into the puke, then get you home and tuck you into bed). Duty, above and beyond, frankly.

True he has a propensity for buying his friends the most godawful holiday tat and insisting it's "object d'art" (I now have a bagpipe-playing porcelain owl if anybody's interested). But on the plus side he can open a champagne bottle without spilling a drop.

Frankly I'm amazed no-one's made an honest man of him yet. Now's your chance.